Today is blue bin day. Hubby is at work, which means it’s up to me to transport the bin from the house, to the pavement. The outside world. Oh my god, it’s exciting. Today I make the decision to do it fully dressed and not in my pyjamas. And it’s not even 10 o’clock!!! I briefly consider involving the children but it’s been raining, which means puddles, which means fun and laughter, quickly followed by screaming and crying. No, this adventure I’m doing solo.
As I open the gate, I check for other people. It’s week 12 of shielding and having to make polite socially distanced chit chat with people is quite daunting. I really don’t have much to say, not having Netflix and all. The coast is clear, we are good to leave the property. I drag the bin out and duly note the other blue bins. Don’t know why, but you always have to check that the neighbours have got their bins out too, just in case they might know something you don’t!!?!
Now, blue bin day is not as exciting as black bin day. Black bin day is the day you get rid of all the rotting food you’ve got in the bottom of the fridge. The bags of uneaten salad that have gone all black and watery. Decomposed basically, because every week you swear you are going to stop eating crap and eat sensibly from now on. It’s been 12 weeks since lock down started and you can’t keep eating like this. So you buy salad stuff by the ton, then before you know it, it’s Friday and you’ve not touched it. But it only lasts 3 days. So you watch it turn into mulch as you don’t want to put it in the bin just yet as that means you have accepted defeat. The frozen chips have won…again.
Of course, when you’ve got 3 year olds, it doesn’t really matter what food you buy. They only want to eat crap. They talk the talk, but when it comes down to it, if it’s not beige and comes out of the freezer, they’re not interested. I like to think that I’m an all right cook, but these two have knocked all creativity out of me when it comes to thinking of things they might like. I mean, what was I thinking making butternut squash pasta?! For goodness sake woman!!! I’ve even succumbed to putting chocolate milk in their porridge so they will eat a decent breakfast!! Today they didn’t have their first ice cream until 11.30 – that’s a win in this house. They’ve got it sussed since we had that heatwave, ‘mummy, I’m so hot, I need something to cool me down. Something from the freezer?’ ‘Oh yeah, what could that be?’ ‘Ice cream!!!!’
‘Mummy, I have a sore leg, I need something to make it better!!’
‘Mummy, he hit me! I need something to make the ouchie go away!’
Normally, I would just think, it’s only ‘x’ amount of hours until wine o’clock. But I’ve not been very well recently due to my Crohn’s disease flaring up, so now I chill out with paracetamol and chamomile tea in the evening. And if I’m feeling naughty, some chocolate!!!! I’m really looking forward to that Merlot though as soon as I’m better!!! I consoled myself this week with some online retail therapy. Some new clothes? No. Shoes? Don’t be daft! I bought the hoover I’ve been after for ages, a Shark!!!!! Purely based on the advert where it hoovers up Cheerios without one of those little o’s being left behind. Sold, I’m in! As soon as it arrived, I put it together and set about vacuuming those wooden floors, and it did not disappoint. So, get yourselves a Blue Light Card (fellow key workers), and save yourself a bundle. Forget your 20% off at Lovehoney and Ann Summers my friends, ecstasy is sitting down and admiring your dust free laminate floors after you’ve given them a good going over with your Shark Dual Action thank you very much!!!!
It’s almost time for part two of my blue bin day adventure. The bin retrieval. Once I hear the dulcet rumbles of the bin lorry, I’ll be putting my shoes back on and venturing outside again, armed with my wipes of course. Ooh, the excitement of it all. Tomorrow, I have to have a blood test, but this time, they are sending someone to my house to do it!!!!!! But it’s ok….because I’ve got the Shark. My house will be presentable, even if my children are not!! I hope everyone in the outside world is well and getting through this difficult time in their own special way, and that sometime soon, we can all be together, preferably with a large glass of vino, and be able to say, what the hell was that all about?!!!???